Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap – 2/9/16

The other night I saw God and it turns out he looks exactly like Bruce Springsteen.

I haven’t completely figured out if there’s a poetic meaning behind it all, but my 30th Springsteen concert was part of The River Tour, meaning he would be playing the entire iconic double album straight through before launching into another full set. I’d missed the original River Tour. I was too young to go to a show, a fact that didn’t comfort me in the least when my parents and my sister left the house and promised to bring me back a tee shirt. No joke: I remember almost nothing from the earliest part of my life – and when it comes to the night I had to miss the Bruce show, I can vividly recall the name of my babysitter and that the feety pajamas I was wearing were yellow.

I still have the shirt they brought me. It fits now. I’ve been to many shows since and I feel nothing but blessed for all of those perfect … Continue reading

February 10th, 2016 | No Comments | Posted in Uncategorized

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap – 2/2/16

Is there a place a nonreligious girl like myself can go to ask for forgiveness for taking last week off and not recapping the episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills when Faye Resnick came face to face with the woman she talked total bullsh*t about twenty years ago in a book that was written in two weeks alongside one of the editors of the National Enquirer so she could most effectively capitalize off the murder of someone she claimed was her best friend in the whole entire world? Would it suffice for everyone to know that, even more than I hate the slug-like Resnick, I hate myself for spending last Tuesday night leisurely resting up for the Springsteen concert I went to the following evening instead of watching the Housewives devolve into simmering pits of resentment while the sea monster in their midst sat calmly on a patio she probably decorated? Can I ever possibly come to terms with the fact that it took me a full day to actually watch that slithering … Continue reading

February 3rd, 2016 | No Comments | Posted in Uncategorized

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap – 1/19/16

I’m not quite sure how it can be this way, but there remains a rather quixotic side to my personality and it’s really starting to piss me off. It just doesn’t make any sense! Really, you’d think a constant and steady exposure to questionable people starring on mindless reality shows would have eliminated my patently unrealistic levels of idealism, but that’s just not the case – and I can’t seem to help it. I somehow still harbor the insane belief that most people are good, that they actively want to better humanity at large. Trust me: I’ve tried to quiet the blatantly out-of-vogue ideals I still blame my parents for instilling in me back when they were hippies who tried to pass carob off as chocolate. It’s totally their fault that I cannot seem to cease having faith in the fact that the vast majority of us must have actual reasons for the times we find ourselves behaving in a manner that could best be described as heinously inappropriate.

The thing is, I no longer … Continue reading

January 20th, 2016 | No Comments | Posted in Uncategorized