And now the Househusbands arrive: Mr. Lisa, Rumbly Mauricio, and Dr. Paul. But let’s be clear, even despite the encouraged flirtation between The Glands and Mr. Lisa, this segment is all about Mauricio, the official Hottest Househusband. (That’s not too hard as there are fewer and fewer official Husbands – cold, hot, or medium – as the franchises wind their way along.) We are treated to a video montage of the Magic of Mauricio, which includes not one but two flashes of his bare behind. Holy cats, NYPD Blue is back! Mauricio hasn’t gotten any nude photos sent to him recently, Mr. Lisa feels Lisa doesn’t need BJ lessons, fluffy Dr. Paul feels Taylor needs filler in her cheeks, and we’re out.
Time to clear the room of the purple rug, bring in some new furniture including a floral arrangement on the coffee table that looks exactly like a fake one my mother has in the dining room, and get caught up with Kim post-rehab. Kim looks a lot less raisiny, which is a triumph in and of itself. The truth about Kimmy is that she’s an alcoholic, and this was her third and most successful trip to rehab. She feels she will be successful this time because she was ready, and this was the right place for her to go. She says that although she has slipped in the past, she credits herself for continuing to try, and dammit she should. Her family held an intervention the day after Thanksgiving, which wasn’t entirely needed as she wanted to go to rehab and was ready. And now she’s back, and really seems great. And lucid!
Exactly what was going on with Kim? Well, she was sober at the start of the season, but had been taking prescribed anxiety meds as she suffers from high anxiety and panic disorder. The problem wasn’t that Kim was on prescription meds while having addiction issues, the problem is that she decided to stop taking her meds, lost confidence, and the wheels came off. On Game Night, Kim had just taken some new medication that she probably shouldn’t have taken until bedtime, so she had some adverse affects and being picked at by Brandi just made her unravel. Kim’s sorry for hiding Brandi’s crutches (really? I’m not), and she thinks Brandi should be sorry for hurting and humiliating her entire family, especially her kids. She will be civil to her in the future, but will not forgive and forget. Fair enough. So did Brandi help, as she likes to think she did? Sounds like nope.
Kim is NOT WITH THE BM anymore, hallelujah! She moved out and wishes him the best in his search for new lifemates on Match.com. Oh, and she wasn’t pregnant, either, just experiencing a Ramonaception. That’s a relief! I continue to hold out hope for a reunion between Kim and Ian Eisenmann. It would be a little Flowers in the Attic, and yet I feel they are meant for one another.
In comes Kyle in her jaunty sequined blazer. (No word on where she got it, but the spike bracelet is Anitako Jewelry.) This, she announces, is the Real Kim. I like the Real Kim! And they seem to be getting along. Kyle acknowledges that she had been trapped into expending a lot of nervous energy trying to keep her fragile sister from being exposed. Kim acknowledges that a lot of anger built up between them because of incidents that Kim would later not recall but Kyle would remain angry about because, well, she wasn’t drunk. The real reason Kim missed her flight to Hawaii was because her driver’s license was expired and she couldn’t find her passport after moving, simple as that. She accepts that her sobriety had gotten away from her and she was behaving like an alcoholic, but was still was mad that Kyle couldn’t let it go and had everyone embroiled in it. Hey me too!
Are the sisters pinning their nightgowns together again? Seems like it! Kyle feels Kim is a different person than she’s been in years. The angry sister is gone, and the fun one is back. Kim, for her part, really wants her sobriety, and really wants to be Kyle’s big sister again so Kyle can lean on her for a change. Isn’t that sweet! No word on Kim’s plans for Season 3.
So after it all, we end on a high note! Who would have thought. Hugs and kisses to you, and to all the BH 9-ers, a good night! See you tomorrow in the OC!
Written by:
Elizabeth Spilotro
Website: www.thislittlemama.com
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Hallelujah!! Great to hear you will be recapping the RHOC. Keep up the great work. Always look forward to reading your site.
Thanks Elizabeth for a very entertaining season of RHOBH recaps. I’ve never written in (even to Steve) but wanted to let you know I’m glad that you are taking over for RHOOC. Yay! I had a headache after reading the last writer’s recap. I’m looking forward to lots of laughs from your witty columns.
I went to the trouble of setting up an account just to make sure you know how much I’ve LOVED your summaries. Between you and Steve, Tuesdays are my favorite day to “ignore” my kids for an hour, read, and laugh. Thank you for taking the time to do this. Your re-caps are better than the show!
Great recap Elizabeth!! So glad you are taking over OC!!
Awesome recap. Not sure why these women dislike Brandi. I think she is sincere and honest.
Woohoo! So glad that you will be recapping RHOOC!
Look forward to your detailed recaps. I live in Canada and we are a few episodes behind.
Looking forward to the OC recaps as well.
thanks