You know what really sets me up for a wonderful, harmonious holiday with family and friends? Watching a bunch of bratty broads bicker. It just puts me in the mood.

Beyond the BH9, here’s the news:

* Kim Zolciak Biermann is involved in a rather nasty family disagreement with her parents in general and mother in particular. They are suing for the right to grandparent visitation with her four children (the youngest of which they have never met) who they haven’t seen since Kim’s 11-11-11 wedding which they were unceremoniously ejected from when they tried to use an inside bathroom rather than the Port-A-Poops intended for the wedding guests. Kim is trying to give them the stiff arm, while the Zolciaks are busy telling anyone who will listen that the real issue is that Kim is jealous of her mother’s hot bony bod.

* Lisa Vanderpump’s new show centered on SUR will debut January 7th and is called “Vanderpump Rules”.

* Not that I understand what was going on in the first place, but Gretchen Rossi has won her $500K defamation lawsuit against her ex-boyfriend, who claimed her relationship with the old guy who died was all a sham, etc.

That’s about it. I’m sure there’s some stuff going on in Atlanta and Miami but I can’t be bothered. I’ve got a turkey to roast and pies to roll out so let’s get cracking.

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