And we’re back. Time for yet another party in the BH9. Before we get to lil’ Portia’s birthday extravaganza, here’s the Housewife roundup:

* The Oof-Ifs very quickly settled all aspects of their divorce last week! Taking a page from the TomKat playbook, it would seem. No sooner did that get finalized than Adrienne was hustling her son Christian to Mt. Sinai Hospital to be seen for three broken fingers and calling in child protective services, again, over an allegation that Dr. Paul was abusing the kid, again. Adrienne’s story was that Dr. Paul and Christian were “playfully kicking each other” when Dr. Paul shoved Christian to the ground. Dr. Paul’s version was that Christian fell off a step at the school carnival while the nanny was watching and Dr. Paul was buying tickets. Wildly differing, no? Anyway, CPS decided the allegation was unfounded and as it turned out Christian’s fingers were bruised, not broken, anyway. I’m sure there will be much more of this to come.

* Speaking of hospital visits, The Glands was … Continue reading →

Today is the day you’ve been waiting for with bated breath – the return of my RHOBH recap column! I know it’s been a lot of anticipation, all leading up to November 6th. What have we done with ourselves these last few months while our BH9ers have been offscreen? And what have they been doing? Let’s get caught up, shall we?

* Lisa Vanderpump sold the Chateau Pump and “moved house” so she’s no longer the Oof-Ifs’ neighbor and got to work on her own proposed spinoff centered on SUR;

* Kim, who is now sober, ditched The Bear and got some work done;

* Kyle opened a retail establishment of some sort and got some lipo, rumor has it;

* Camille, who is relegated to FOH status this season, endured a slew of really obnoxious and juvenile behavior from Frasier and his teenage beard, most recently the beard appearing at the Playboy Halloween party dressed as what seemed to be a Camille costume (and accompanied by the newborn baby Frase, just to make sure … Continue reading →